Tuesday, April 12, 2016
A different kind of military history museum
As I've mentioned before in a post about Vienna, I love military history. So when I had a little extra time I decided to check out the Militärhistorisches Museum der Bundeswehr. It's in Dresden, so very close at about two hours by train from Prague and it is for sure a different kind of military history museum, you can tell right away from the building's facade.
The facade is interrupted, obviously on purpose, because the pathos of this museum, also Germany's largest at 20,000 square meters, is to alter the public's perception of war. My perception of war was not altered by this museum, but it did make me think about it. Perhaps the museum's curators and I have a similar perception of war.
My first perception was that the museum was closed. So, I suggest before you go that you look here and check the hours. It's closed on Wednesdays at least that is what I worked out after talking with the rather pleasant soldier who kicked me off the grounds. Oh, yeah this military history museum seems to be located in an active garrison, at least the soldiers and clearing barrels in front of buildings would suggest that, so don't be an idiot when visiting.
Upon discovering that the military history museum is closed "alle Mittwoch, jeden Mittwoch" I decided that I'd explore Dresden a little more. My train back was 10 hours away, so there wasn't much else to do. I decided that I would return the next week to check out the museum, but not on a Wednesday.
Often when I visit places I take some time to wander around and see what the situation on the street is like. After some time getting lost in the feel of a place I'll check out the museums and inside of places. I'd been to Dresden before to explore the outside before and I thought this was a good chance to see the insides of some places. Honestly, it as snowing and cold and I didn't want to spend a ton of time out in it. But there is one outside "attraction" in Dresden worth noting.
Hmmm, what is this rather-interesting looking stairway randomly placed in the corner of a square? Where could it possibly lead? I've seen it before because it's close to the Hauptbahnhof so I'll quit with the suspense bit.
It's a stairway to a sewer. Now, I've made jokes before about Germans being a coprophilic bunch, but this takes "odd" to a new level. I could continue to babble on about how this is weird, but I'm the one who took a photo of a sewer, so I think Germany and I can call things even and just not talk about this again.
After pulling my mind out of the sewer. I thought perhaps it would be interesting to visit a church or two. That makes sense, right?
The last time I was in Dresden I saw Frauenkirche from the outside. There is a big statue of Martin Luther out front -- because it's a Protestant church. It was summer and there were tons of people and there was so much to see I didn't get to go inside. On this day the town was virtually empty, at least of tourists, and I felt like I had the Altstadt to myself. I'm sure the Wikipedia page I linked to explains the history about how Frauenkirche was completely destroyed by the allied fire bombing of Dresden in February\y of 1945, sat as a pile of rubble until the late 1990s and was then rebuilt. They did an amazing job.
I did visit the nave, but for me the impressive part was climbing the dome. Logically, it is the most modern church dome I have yet to ascend. To me it was impressive to see all the balcony seating that was available as I climbed to the top of the structure. There aren't even that many stairs, it's mostly a gently sloping ramp to the top.
Yes, there are some stairs, especially to get to the outside top part of the dome. I do recommend it, the view is completely worth it. Dresden is pretty when there is a dusting of snow on it.
If you look closely, especially in the dark areas you can see the snow falling. So, speaking of dark areas let's get to the Militärhistorische Museum der Bundeswehr. The museum is heavily dedicated to covering the time period from 1914 to the present. When you first walk in to the exhibition space on the ground floor you are greeted to a display about "substances." The first thing I saw was a tube of Pervitin and a bunch of alcohol. Pervitin is the original crystal meth.
Things continued from there. I found the display about PPE, or personal protective equipment, quite interesting. This museum is expertly curated in my opinion.
At the very least the curators are willing to take some risks. There is a display about animals of warfare that includes weaponized bees from experiments at Los Alamos National Labs. All the bees are dead though, or fortunately maybe. In some gun displays bullets are suspended in front of muzzles in an attempt to bring an element of movement to what could otherwise be an average static thing.
Protection continued with these devices, the caltrop and some bomb shelters etc and in the same room were the reasons some of these things exist, bearing down upon them menacingly.
Again, and element of life and motion was given to this ordinance. Many museums would have just lined them up with little cards describing what you are looking at. Psychologically, missiles and bombs are infinitely more intimidating when they are bearing down on you. You get to look at this display of aerial ordinance from a few levels as you work your way through the upper floors of the museum. There are a few displays like this were you can view them from many different angles and levels.To be fair there were also some more traditional displays. Even though this is a different kind of military history museum the curators can't hit it out of the park on every display, the place is just too massive.
Right next to the display about protective devices. Remember, the one all these missiles and bombs were bearing down on, is one of those not-so-dynamic displays, the subject matter is however, fascinating.
I get it, at first this probably isn't going to blow your skirt up. It's a scale model of the Gustav Gun, the 800mm (31.5") artillery piece for when you want to lob family-sedan sized high explosive rounds at your enemies from 30 miles away. These days we just use missiles. Keep in mind that the largest-ever used naval gun was a little over 1/2 the size of this one at 460mm and the 16" Mark 7 guns found on U.S. Iowa Class battleships were only 406mm. How big exactly is this round?
Exactly this big. Notice the chunk of iron on the right that looks a bit like a heat sink. That is an actual section of the barrel from one of these massive guns, the lines you see are the barrel's rifling. Yes, more than one of these guns was built, but I think only one was ever used in combat. The projectile you see laying down is a practice or "dummy" round, the one standing up is a high explosive round and it is much more than 2 meters tall.
While I keep saying this is a different kind of military history museum, other than for SEO reasons, I don't feel I've done such a great job of showing you what really set this place apart from the other museums I've visited. Many military history museums just line up a lot of weapons and identify them. It's a bit like, "Hi, look here is a display of weapons from the 1300s in the next room we have guns from the 1600s. Have you see our canons? They are outside next to the tanks."
For me, the Militärhistorisches Museum der Bundeswehr started to set itself apart when it got into toys. What you see above is a toy tank that was found in the ruins of Dresden after the 1945 bombing. Charging valiantly after it is a division of armored toys.
"Oh boy, here we go again." I muttered to myself. I was literally alone for most of the 10 hours I spend in the museum. "Now I get to look at an entire floor of displays screaming about how making toys of the instruments of war is horrible and damages society and turns little boys into blood-thirsty, violent rapists."
This stick display didn't do much to convince me I was wrong, but I stuck with it as I looked over the toy display, waiting to read about how evil I was because I played army five times as a child. Maybe it was more than five times, I fought some fierce battles against the British using the gun emplacement at Compo Beach as a boy. Those Brits were tenacious but my friends and I in the "Sea Squirts" held them off.
To be honest some of the toys actually offended me a little at first and I had to think about kids in the U.S. dressing up in BDUs and ACUs I've seen that often and THAT never bothered me, why should this:
They didn't have BDUs or ACUs in 1940 a Wehrmacht uniform looked like this, it was the only option for playing army for German kids. That coat actually looks pretty warm and Germans don't really half-ass a lot of things -- not even sewer displays, so a real deal metal helmet for little Helmut Jr. makes perfect sense. The message the toy displays was trying to send was one I can really get behind. "Children need to learn the difference between good and evil. Playing war is an excellent way to do that." I was amazed that this was the message and totally support it.
Even this display was interesting and I think probably quite valuable since it was a product list from a toy company in Dresden which was wiped off the map in the bombing. This was essentially the only thing that remained of the toy company. It was a manufacturing facility, there was no way to know if it was producing weapons or not. Yes, technically it was, but they were really tiny and harmless -- unless swallowed.
There were even multiple displays about musical instruments. Instruments used to be crucial to warfare. Drums and flags is how orders were given to large groups of troops all at once. You literally could not coordinate maneuvers without a band.
This piano was not used to coordinate troop movements, but it is an example of some seriously expert inlay work. As the soviets closed in on Dresden this magnificent example of craftsmanship was hastily covered and the piano continued its service. It was a smart move, and whoever covered it did an excellent job because it remained hidden until just a few years ago, which is why the work is in such good shape.
Look, you can not have a German military history museum without discussing Nazis. That is just how it goes. I will go so far as to say you can not have a German history museum -- full stop -- without discussing the Nazis. They were an important part of the country's history.
Images like this poster from Hitler's 1932 campaign should never be forgotten. Honestly, he looks so creepy here that there is no way I would have voted for him based solely on this. I worked extra hard to get that reflection of that MG 34 in the photo too, so give me a little credit please.
There was more of this kind of stuff after the toys exhibit and there were some other interesting attempts at thought-provoking displays, but it was a lot like other museums until the top two floors. There is a need for the kinds of things you see in all military history museums and they still tried with the dynamic and interactive displays. At a few points though I felt as though they tried a little too hard not to include some kinds of Nazi items. It's hard to talk about how horrible you once were.
Like this puppy above. This is a mortar round. It isn't an ordinary mortar round, it is a gas round from WWI. It is not filled with lethal gas though. By the time this round came into existence gas masks were saving lives in trenches. The lethal gases being used to kill people were chemically too large to go through the gas mask filters. This round was fired first because the non-lethal, yet highly irritating, gas it contained would penetrate gas mask filters and force soldiers to strip the mask off to breathe without pain, then the Germans would launch lethal gas in after to kill everyone who has stripped off their masks. I'm pretty sure tactics like this violate the Geneva Conventions now.
There were some cool displays about the pre-WWII helmets. Most units had different helmets. It seems like it was quite complicated, but you could tell a lot about a soldier based on his helmet. Then in WWII mass production became a bit more practical.
The famous Wehrmacht helmet was stamped several times into its iconic shape.
There are, of course, many impressive weapons displays through the museum. Probably one of my favorites was a gun designed specifically to shoot down hot-air balloons. From what I was able to see, the Panzerfaust is something the Germans were particularly proud of. It looks like it was versatile.
Your standard 150mm unit here with a group of suppressors for various rifles. Why not keep quiet before you bring the thunder with your Panzerfaust.
And here we have your standard anti-tank bicycle, because why, not? A cheap, reliable, effective and quiet way to get one soldier into a position to possibly take out two tanks. Pretty brilliant if you ask me. These kinds of things are what I love about museums like these. Sure art museums show cool art and pretty things, but in terms of practical innovation that was tested and used, military museums are hard to beat.
There wasn't exactly what I would call a "wealth of information" about the Battle of Stalingrad but there was this stuff. Some boots and a Christmas tree that belonged to the commanding general.
And the Battle of Stalingrad was a horrible ordeal for sure and atrocities were committed on both sides. Many people forget that Nazi soldiers weren't the only assholes.
Advancing Soviet soldiers defaced this painting of Carl Constantin Gustav von Nostitz-Drzewiecki. That's a name isn't it? It's a nice painting and a shame that is was defaced like this.
Then we got into the DDR for a little bit. This too is a substantial part of German history and something the Germans are still dealing with. There was a huge migration of East Germans to the West as soon as the wall came down and now many are starting to trickle back. Sadly, the divide did real, long-term damage to Germany on the whole.
Living in a formerly communist country I understand that still, to this day, stamps on things are important. You have to get stamps for everything. If you buy a stamp at the post office you will get a stamp for having bought a stamp and I'm told it's no where near as bad as it once was. I think it's safe to say that in the DDR you weren't shit without a stamp. So whoever had this briefcase must have been one bad mother... .It was pretty cool to see a museum display confirming the importance of stamping things.
Remember it IS a military history museum. Here we have the DDR version of the AK-47 rifle, the KMS-72, two of them actually. The bottom one is your standard combat weapon and the one on top is the millionth one to roll off the assembly line. I wonder where the millionth M-16 is.
After you pass through the DDR, you get to the modern Bundeswehr stuff. It talks about their NATO activity and some modern deployments, but there isn't a ton of stuff about it, not as much as the WWII era stuff but I would say more than the DDR era. Then you get to the top two floors, which are all about how we remember war and how it impacts us.
The Germans made baseball cards.
You can't blame them though. We Americans made Top Gun to honor some of our pilots. Is watching Top Gun as cool as collecting cards of all your favorite aces, definitely not. And how many American baseball players get to pose with their dogs? If you are such a badass pilot than your collector's card is a photo of you with your dog, you are a legit stud.
Of course some photos were a little more, traditional. These guys are your boring, run-of-the-mill badasses. And it's all fun to look at these cards and imagine them as a way to get support from the populace, but perhaps these cards were the only photos loved ones had of their family members who were in combat. Unless you received one of these:
This is Willy. Willy was a true German hero. Willy gave his life for Germany. This letter tells his family what an exceptional young man Willy was. It is meticulously put together and nicely bound. It is something the family would have kept for a very long time to remember that their son was a hero. I respect this. We do some similar things in America. After a while in WWII there were just two many people dying to keep making these. If your German is good enough you can read about the hero Willy was, someone should -- he earned it.
Remember the photo of the facade of the museum at the beginning of this post? I know it is WAAAAY back up there and a lot of scrolling around, but you can go out into that metal section that cuts through the building. The view is great.
There are also, on the top floor of the museum, sections of sidewalk from the city of Dresden with unexploded bomb impact holes from the 1945 bombing. These sections of sidewalk were still being used in the city until some time in the 2000s. I'm sure they were in place for so long that people didn't even know what the holes were from anymore. It also looks like there were a lot of duds falling from the sky.
A not-too-huge section of the museum, one wing on the ground floor, is dedicated to history from 1300 - 1914. I'm sorry, but that is a substantial amount of history to squeeze into one floor of one wing of a museum, no matter how big it is. There were some cool things, but as a representation of history from this time period the space was woefully inadequate. There were some good displays in what I would consider a highlight reel for this time period.
Like this recruiting poster for the Prussian Cavalry from the 1780s. I don't read German, especially not German this fancily written, but I can only imagine it says something like, "Travel to the New World and help the Americans kill Englishmen. Enlist today!" Or there was this:
This is a target showing how you should shoot to qualify. This target is from the 1913 and guns were not quite what they are today, but leave it to the Germans to say, "You must shoot exactly like this." I showed this to a Marine I know and his response was, "that is a horrible pattern." So once again, if you're a good shooter, this pattern is with a 100 year old rifle with 100 year old ammo.
Look, being a soldier sucks. There isn't really much more to say than that. It sucks today, it's going to suck tomorrow, it sucked 200 years ago. As a result soldiers have earned the right to complain, and they do -- a lot, but if you're reading this and you're in the military look down at your feet. Look at your feet and then thank God that you never had to march all over Europe wearing these puppies:
Do you have two left feet? Do you wake up and have to get dressed in a hurry and sometimes mix up your left and right shoes? Well, those problems are over with these über-easy-to-manufacture miracles of footwear. They are going to be all the rage in Milan this year. There is no left or right shoe, it's just shoe. If I had to walk from Spain to Ukraine in these I would desert. At least they had shoes.
Then you have this thing. It belonged to Hessian Captain Georg Ernst von Gilsa. That wiki page is all in German, so you'll need to Google translate it. Georg was a mildly-important figure in American history as he fought with the British, like about 16000 other Hessians, during the Revolutionary war and kept a diary about it. It's a good thing there weren't more guys like Georg though. He was wearing this jacket at the Battle of Vellinghausen when a shell shattered his elbow and he had his arm amputated right behind the firing line, he went on to get promoted to colonel and become a Hessian Councilor for War.
And what military history museum would be complete without a set of dueling pistols? Not a single one, is the answer you're looking for here. This set is surprisingly complete and it belonged in an outfit where the commanding general REQUIRED his officers to duel. You think your staff duty sucks today folks?
There was all manner of cool stuff hastily curated into this display of 700 years of history. It really wasn't fair. Flintlock rifles to wild Dutch submarines. The curators did their best.
This is a model of the crazy Dutch submarine. They have the real one in the museum, next to the real V2 rocket, but it was too big to photograph well in the tiny space they shoehorned it into.
I don't care who you are, you can't call yourself a military history museum without at least one military vehicle. A tank garden gives you real cred. The one at the Militärhistorisches Museum der Bundeswehr is pretty good and includes a PT boat. It was very cool to see soviet armor right next to its western counterparts. There were some vehicles from the WWII too and a couple of jets.
So after 10 or so hours at the museum it was time to catch my train home. Of course there is so much more than I have mentioned here, you'll just have to check it out for yourself. On the tram ride back to Hauptbahnhof I saw that the opera house was lit up all pretty.
They were having some sort of awards presentation. I don't know what all it was about, but I hopped out of the tram and took a photo anyway.
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Friday, March 18, 2016
Auschwitz Concentration Camp
Some may remember my post from Christmas about Poland. I mentioned that I visited the Auschwitz concentration camp. I didn't want to post about in until after the holidays.While the entire place is very sad I must say that it is not the most depressing place I have visited. That would be Terezinstadt. You can read my post about that ghetto again if you like. Auschwitz had a more sanitized, museum type feel to it. There was only one point where I really felt impressive sorrow, but I'll get to that later.
If you like there are day-trip bus tours that leave from Prague and go to Auschwitz and back. The price is generally reasonable and there are sometimes sales. I'm not completely sure about the language the tours will be in. I think all the ones I've ever researched were Czech, so that might not do a lot of good for some people. I will discuss getting to Auschwitz from Krakow because it's what I did.
I spent a lot of time googling how exactly to get to Auschwitz from Krakow. The best way is by bus. I went to the main bus station and asked at the information window where I could find the bus going to Auschwitz. Well, I didn't ask really. I listened while people in front of me in line asked and thought I would be polite and rescue the lady at the information window from having to answer the same question three times in a row.
At the main bus station it is not clearly marked anywhere how, or where, you can find the hourly bus that will take you to Auschwitz. You really do have to ask at the information window and they will not sell you tickets. They will however, direct you to the correct platform. After that it is pretty easy to see which bus you need as it is clearly marked by a sign in the front window. You must buy your ticket from the bus driver. It's not very expensive, I think 5 or 10 Zloty. The trip takes a little more than an hour and the bus drivers are used to tourists so everything will go smoothly.
The bus drops you very close to the entrance to the museum and it picks you up in the same place. Returning is the opposite. Be advised that there are no reserved tickets for the bus and when you line up to come back it's first-come, first-served. Because the bus makes other stops and is not a direct one it will fill up. On my return trip, which was on the penultimate bus, there were people standing.
I suggest buying a ticket to visit the museum online. A ticket is required to visit the museum, but not Birkenau, which is where the camp is. A tour of the museum includes a tour of Birkenau. I didn't buy a ticket online and there was a line at the tiny, white trailer of a ticket booth in front of the museum. The nearest English tour was all full up so I had to buy one for the tour two hours later. So I went to Birkenau on the free shuttle bus to kill time.
This is the famous entrance to Birkenau as seen from inside the camp. obviously the railroad tracks are very symbolic and I was not the only one setting my camera on them hoping for the Spielberg shot. While it is interesting to just wander Birkenau alone, I recomend a tour too. You will learn and understand a lot more.
The first thing I noticed that no movie or photograph can even come close to capturing is the size of the place. It is huge. I think it is 1km by 2km or something like that. At one point something like 100 thousand people were living there. It was a city, not a village or town but a city. It was so large that the Germans needed waste-water treatment facilities and were building a second plant when the camp was liberated.
What you see above is most of what remains of the buildings where prisoners were housed. The Nazis took off in a hurry and left the infirmed who they didn't think could travel to fend for themselves. This happened during the Polish winter. The remaining prisoners used the wood from the buildings, and presumably anything else flamable, to keep themselves alive.
There are hundreds of these chimneys standing in well-organized rows placed with German effeciency like giant, fragile toubstones. There were so many that I didn't even attempt to count them.
Some of the wooden structures have been reconstructed. Here you can see what they looked like. There were also brick houses at the camp but there is some trouble with those. Evidently there was some agreement or charter for the camp that was made in the spirit of keeping the camp in its original condition. Somehow, this equates to zero maintenance being performed at Birkenau. There are a few reconstructions and I'm not sure exactly how it works, but the guide told us that in a few years it will most likely not be safe to enter any of the existing brick buildings once used to house prisoners. Some of them are already off limits and have had wooden braces erected to keep them standing.
This is one of the brick buildings used to house mostly women and children. Not the Rtiz Carlton, but better looking than the wooden ones. I doubt either one was particularly comfortable. And as much as I hate to make comparisons between these horrible places, the conditions at Auschwitz on the whole looked more comfortable than at Terezin.
This is not a reproduction rail car. This is the real deal. I've seen the rail cars in movies etc, but I can't recall ever seeing them with the guard shack attached. That is how they were. The guide told us that there was no doubt that this rail car was used to transport prisoners to concentration camps. It is not known if this particular car transported prisoners to Birkenau and the guide wouldn't even speculate on that.
The rail lines at the camp kept getting extended until finally they lead right to the ovens at the back of the property. The idea was to just unload people straight into the ovens. The guide said the camp was liberated before that ever happened on a large scale and that it may have only occured once or twice. You can see the gatehouse in the distance a kilometer away. This place is pretty much at the very back of the camp.
As the Nazis realized that the Soviets were swiftly approaching they decided that having a functioning, large scale extermination facility might not look too good. So they destroyed the gas chambers and crematoriums at the back of the camp within sight of the railhead with the flowers above. I took this photo for the whole, from the ruins of horror springs life thing with that wildflower growing out of the rubble cliche.
For me the most striking thing about both Auschwitz and Birkenau was the amount of barbed wire. There was a lot of it. It was also something that I think they replace every so often to keep the camp looking authentic. I haven't read anything about the way they can only maintian the camp, but from the sounds of it that part needs some improvement.
This is a section of wire fencing at Birkenau. This particular area was a road of sorts to the gas chambers. New arrivals to the camp disembarked very close to where the railroad car above is, then they were assessed based on their potential for labor. Women and children generally had a diminished capacity for work and were lead down this road to the gas chambers. Even this became troublesome and that is when someone had the idea to just run the trains straight to the chambers.
In keeping with the theme of the barbed-wire fencing we travel now to the main Auschwitz camp itself. The fencing at the main Auschwitz camp was electrified. It may have been the same story at Birkenau, but I don't know. Much like Terezin, Auschwitz was a repurposed military garrison. Most of the buildings were barracks for the Polish army.
The Germans did their level best to turn the place into a city of sorts, but there are definite prison motifs throughout.
When your building is described as a "block" there aren't a lot of options as to what it could be. So many of these building have been cleared, cleaned and converted into museum spaces that the feeling is completely different from what it once was. That is why I say Terezin is so much more poignant. In Terezin it feels like the Nazis just packed up and split. They threw open the doors and fled and that is how things stayed. Being there is like walking through a tomb. Auschwitz is very much different.
There are some impressively sad displays at Auscwitz and it's something everyone should remember and see at least once in his life. Will I return? Maybe, I didn't feel much sorrow or pain here and feel a touch indifferent about Auschwitz proper.
Displays like the shoes above have been expertly curated to make us feel something about the scope of the horrors that occured in this place, or more accurately in nearby Birkenau. The way they are done, to me reduced their effect. A pile of thousands of shoes behind glass is impressive, but knowing it's only a fraction of reality made it feel sanitized for me.
A bit more effective was this display of glasses. But still, they are just things. Things which define humanity yes, but so far removed in time and strategically placed that they have a diminished impact for me.
Even this display of used Zyklon B canisters just didn't have me tearing up. Things did start to get real however when we were ushered into a room full of human hair and then told that the Nazis made a hefty profit reselling the hair from dead prisoners for industrial purposes. Firstly, I had no idea hair could be used for so many things and secondly; humans, no matter what their status, are not livestock and to treat them as fodder for industry like sheep or cattle is offensive at best.
What you see above is the only place that was truly saddening for me. The Germans took and old Polish powder magazine and used it to test just how efective Zyklon B was. There were small holes in the roof and SS troopers stood atop it, punctured the canisters and dropped them inside. This place is where the most repulsive element of the Final Solution was perfected. It is the first gas chamber. The gas was tested in the basement of one of the blocks first, but this was the first place where they really got things working right. I will not speculate about what those marks are on the wall. I will let you draw your own conclusion, but those marks are one of the few things in Auschwitz that have not been deliberately placed there to move you and that makes them some of the most horrible marks in the history of man.
Within sight of the gas chamber are the ovens used to cremate those who met their unfortunate end inside.
Now, before people were gassed, some met their end by firing squad. This happened to relatively few people though. Still there were special areas set up between barracks for the purpose. This one is a reproduction as well as memorial. I doubt you can see them, but there were a few tiny Israeli flags stuck in this one.
In the beginning the Nazis also photographed and registered everyone who came to the camp. This task became too great when thousands of people were arriving by rail each day, so the photographing didn't last too long. I imagine those who went directly from the train to the gas chambers were not registered in any way. Perhaps a mere count of people is all that was done.
This isn't to say that life at Auscwitz proper was hunky dory. The structure you see above was built so that the guards who took roll wouldn't have to stand in the weather when they counted prisoners. Talk about being wussies. I think you can read the sign in the photo. The idea of it to me was offensive.
And then of course we have the main gate. The famous "Arbeit Macht Frei" sign. "Work makes you free." I don't think any blog post about this place would be complete without a photo of this sign.
My trip to Auschwitz and Birkenau was informative and something I recomend to everyone. Go, see it, but have something else planned for the next day that is a little happier -- like the salt mine.
Monday, March 7, 2016
The Definitive Tourist Guide to Prague Public Transport
Good Job, You Made It
So you made it to Prague. Now you need to figure out how to get to all those amazing sites you've seen on billboards, guidebooks and whatnot. You could walk, because Prague is small, but why deprive yourself the pleasure of using Prague's public transport system -- especially trams in the summer.
Many tourists stick to the metro, because it is easy and efficient and goes to many places people want to see. Braver tourists, Czech and foreign alike, try their luck on tram number 22. That tram goes to the castle and many other places tourists like to visit, like Malastrana.
If you read this guide before you go to Prague you will be using public transport like a local and avoid all the dirty looks. I'm going to tell you everything you need to know to get your ticket and ride like an OG Praguer. I'm even going to use photos, so you can see what I'm talking about. Keep in mind that some metro entrances are hard to find. Just ask someone if you're not sure, but there will always be a sign with the name of the station, color of the line and an arrow telling you where it is.
First Thins First
First and foremost and this is the most important thing: buy a ticket! Don't be that guy. A ticket costs 24czk. The inspectors profile and look for tourists. The fine is 800czk.
Got it, Buy a Ticket -- How?
Okay, so no you know to buy a ticket. Where exactly to you do that, and how? You have several options. The easiest is to use a machine. You will find the machines on the right when you enter a metro station. Every station, every time the machines are on the right. Look:
Okay, so now that you know where the machines are what do you do? It's really pretty simple. Realistically, as a tourist there is almost no place in the city that will take more than 30 minutes to get to. So just buy the 24czk ticket from the yellow machines. The photo below has it all explained for you.
That really is it. If you want 3 tickets, push the button three times. If you make a mistake or change your mind, push the "Storno" button and start over.
Not "if" but "when" because Czech coins aren't the best-made things in the world. It's simple, just rub the edge of the coin on the side of the machine. If you look at the photo you will see rusty sections on the sides. That is from people rubbing their coins on them to make them work in the machine.
Now that you know the easiest way for tourists to buy tickets I'll describe some of the other ways. You can buy them via sms, it's very simple but if you don't have an EU sim card maybe not something you want to do, because it will be expensive. All you do is fire up your phone and send an sms to the number 902 06. DPT32 will get you a 90-minute ticket. DPT24 will get you a 30-minute ticket. DPT110 will get you a 24-hour ticket and DPT310 will get you a 72-hour ticket. The number you text is the price of the ticket in crowns. Texting DPT32, for example, will charge 32czk to your phone bill. It can take up to two minutes for you to get a text back with your ticket, so keep that in mind. If you buy the DPT110 or DPT310 ticket you will be sent a text asking you to confirm it. Reply to that text with "ano" and then you will have successfully purchased the ticket.
The F@#king Machine Won't Take my F@#king Money?
Now that you know the easiest way for tourists to buy tickets I'll describe some of the other ways. You can buy them via sms, it's very simple but if you don't have an EU sim card maybe not something you want to do, because it will be expensive. All you do is fire up your phone and send an sms to the number 902 06. DPT32 will get you a 90-minute ticket. DPT24 will get you a 30-minute ticket. DPT110 will get you a 24-hour ticket and DPT310 will get you a 72-hour ticket. The number you text is the price of the ticket in crowns. Texting DPT32, for example, will charge 32czk to your phone bill. It can take up to two minutes for you to get a text back with your ticket, so keep that in mind. If you buy the DPT110 or DPT310 ticket you will be sent a text asking you to confirm it. Reply to that text with "ano" and then you will have successfully purchased the ticket.
Don't worry too much if you forget what to text to what number. There are stickers on the door windows of most tram and metro cars, which technically mean's you're late buying your ticket. You should have the ticket before you start your ride.
The last, and maybe the most intimidating way because maybe you don't think you will be able to conduct a transaction with another human using Czech, is to go to a mini market, potravny or bodega and ask to buy a ticket. All these places have them and they are used to it so if you see a line of idiots who don't seem to be able to figure out the ticket machines and you don't want to send an sms, this is what you want to do. This also comes in handy for trams, because there are perhaps two outdoor ticket machines in the whole city, but almost every tram stop has a mini market or tobacco shop nearby.
I Finally Bought a Ticket, Where do I Stick it?
You have your ticket by now, what's next? You need to validate it. There are small yellow boxes all over the place. They are at the entrances to the metro, on the trams by the doors and on buses. You stick your ticket in the slot in the yellow box and listen for the sound of your ticket being stamped with the current time. After that, you are good to go for however long the ticket says you are. As I suggested 30 minutes. Look at the photo again, see the text next to the yellow boxes?
Now that you're all validated and ready to travel, it's time to get where you are going and you need to know when to get off for that. The metro is easy. Of course doing some research in advance to know which stop you want will go a long way to making your metro experience more efficient and pleasurable. For trams it is essential.
There are Two Metro Tracks, Now What?
Essentially every metro station has the same layout. They are central platforms with tracks on either side of the platform. The only two that are different are Vysehrad and Hlavni Nadrazi on line C. Those two have central tracks with platforms on either side. Honestly, the most difficult part of using the metro is finding which street exit you want, especially at the Karlovo Namesti station. I have Czech friends who say they can never find the right street exit there, so don't feel bad if you can't.
Using your map or guidebook, find the stop you want to get to then just head down to the platform. It doesn't matter if you aren't sure which train you need, finding out is easy. Google directions tells you to take the train heading in the direction of the final stop. In my opinion that is just the name of a place you'll never go and it's a waste of time to remember due to how easy Prague's transport is to use. All you need to do is look at the sign board on the metro platform for the stop you need. There will be an arrow telling you which train you need. Like this:
When you are riding, as the train approaches a stop there will be an announcement telling you what that stop is. There are also digital signs hanging from the roofs of the cars that display the next stop. Over each door is a map of the metro system with pictographs of tourist attractions next to the stop names they are near.
When is my Metro Coming?
Fortunately in the last year Prague got with the program and installed countdown clocks in all the metro stations. Really, it's been less than a year since this has happened. On Sundays trains run every 6 or 7 minutes. The clock will tell you the final destination of the train and how long it will be until the train arrives. Like this.
How do I Know Which Tram I Want?
I'm going to assume you already know which tram number you want. If you don't this could help you, but probably not. Unlike the metro, knowing the final destination of the tram might help a little, especially if you are going more than one or two stops. There are a few ways to get information about the tram you see. These photos should help.
There will be a sign on the front, and back, of the tram telling you the final destination. Also, as you can see in the photo above there is a sign on the side of the tram. The top of the sign tells you the final destination, the bottom of the sign tells you the next stop. I really hope I don't need to explain what the number means. Night trams all start with the number 5 and their schedules are on the back of the signpost. If there is a night tram visiting a stop the number will be in brown, like the 51, 57 and 59 above. Night trams run at 30-minute intervals, don't miss your drunk-filled car because it will be a while before the next one.
Next to the tram you can see the schedule board. It will tell you what trams and buses will stop there and where they are going. Also in the photo, if you look under the number 10 on the tram to the right of the man giving you a dirty look, you will see a ticket validation box. Now for the tram schedules.
I hope you can tell I highlighted the important parts. Here is the breakdown. The stop where you are will be in bold with a line under it. EVERYTHING under the line is where the tram is going (hence the green box). The numbers to the left of the stop name give you an APPROXIMATE time of travel to that stop. If the stop you need to go to appears above the stop where you are, you merely need to walk across the street to the other stop for the same tram. You will basically see the reverse of what you see here. If the stop has a metro station near it there will be an "M" symbol.
When is my Tram Coming?
Most days trams come on time. If you look again to the photo above you will see boxes with times to the right of the destination list. It doesn't matter if you speak Czech, there are pictographs to help you know what the days are. Workdays are designated by a crossed pick and hammer. Saturday has a "6" for some reason and Sunday shows a cross. When the tram stops there will be an announcement telling passengers the stop you are at and what the next stop is so listen closely for the next stop. The trams also have electronic signs hanging from the roof that should tell you the next stop.
What, no Buses?
You're a tourist the only bus you need goes to the airport. It leaves from Nádraží Veleslavín on the green line and is bus number 119 it takes about 15 minutes. There is also an airport express bus leaving from the main train station that takes about 35 minutes. Otherwise. You won't need a bus.
Etiquette and Dos and Don'ts
Stasi-style ticket inspectors are ruthless, they will march you to an ATM to get cash to pay the fine. The often roll with uniform police in tow. In the metro they wear a uniform, on trams and buses they do not. On the trams there will be more than one. They will flash a red badge at you. If they don't have a special machine for reading the city pre-paid pass ask to see ID.
If you do get a fine they are required to give you a receipt. This is the most expensive 90-minute transport pass you will ever buy, but it does allow you to travel for 90 minutes so that is nice. Do not let them forget to give you a receipt, some of them will try to "forget." I'll let you imagine what happens to your fine after that. Usually they are on "tourist" trams 22 and 18 but don't quote me on that.
- Don't get on public transport, then decide that getting on is enough and stop right inside the door. This is not a good idea and it pisses people off, especially the 20 people behind you trying to get to work who now have to push past your stupid ass to get to the empty parts of the tram or metro.
- If you get stuck in the doorway, but need to go a few stops, exit the vehicle and stand to the side and get back on. Blocking the door because it's not your stop is rude.
- If you are wearing a giant backpack, take that stupid thing off and put in on the floor. No one wants to be smacked by your damned bag every time you twist a little to look at something. It is also possible that your freaking bag is so big that it is blocking the isle.
- Don't put your bag on the seat next to you. Come on now, this is just bush league.
- Stand on the right side of the metro escalators. The left is for walking. No one cares how interesting the conversation you are having with your friend is, if they are in a hurry and need to walk the escalator your party on the stairs is really annoying.
- Give up your seat to old, handicapped and pregnant people sometimes even small kids. If you don't know this by now please find your nearest adulting class and attend it.
- Don't stop immediately at the top or bottom of escalators. Move to a place out of the flow of traffic to look at your map or whatever.
- Old ladies will straight up knock you over in their quest to get to an empty seat. We're talking NFL-defensive-tackle-looking-for-a-sack type power and speed. Get out of her way, she will break you.
- If you see a mom with a stroller on a tram with steps, help her. See tip 6.
